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 What does "I Love You" mean to you?

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KimHaedi
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PostSubject: What does "I Love You" mean to you?   Tue Nov 05, 2013 10:18 pm

Well, everyone thinks differently of the 3 words "I love you" whenever someone tells you that.

What does it mean to you? (You can keep your description short if you like. you dont have to explain each different types of love that you believe in) and Tell me at least one reason what don't you like whenever someone did tell you they loved you, but you have a reason to not accept those words.


As for not liking it I despise it whenever a guy tells me that they love me but they barely don't know me OR says it IN THE SPUR OF THE MOMENT. just because their "feeling it".


For me there are different types of love like:

family

friends/idol

and a lover

1.as for a lover, I think the 3 words "I love you" means that you separate that person you think it's special from the world and your feelings for them is different from everyone else that you love.

They mean the world to you and you'll do whatever it takes for them.. that's what I think that love means for that special person. and also, love means to me that you and whoever you love will accept each others weaknesses and strengths as well. and forgive each other no matter what because that is true love as well.



SO TELL ME, what does I love you mean to you? and why don't not sometimes not like it? if there's a dislike of the word love in your reason then explain that.


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PostSubject: Re: What does "I Love You" mean to you?   Tue Nov 05, 2013 11:48 pm

I hate it when friends go up to you and they say "I love you." They throw the words around without realizing the true meaning behind them.

I've only ever said those words to my parents, and I tell them practically every day. They roll their eyes and go "yeah, yeah" but I truly do mean it even though my tone of voice says otherwise. Ex: "Daddy?" "Yeah?" "I looooooove you~" "Sure." So I guess to me, that type of "I love you" is my way of playing around with my parents and showing them affection.

But generally, to me, "I love you" means that you genuinely care about this person from the bottom of your heart, that you accept them for who they are, and will be there for them no matter what whether it's a lover, family member, or friend.



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PostSubject: Re: What does "I Love You" mean to you?   Tue Nov 05, 2013 11:51 pm

first ill make two terms clear:
the light hearted "i love you" for friends and familly
the passionate "i love you" for that special person
basically they mean the same thing but in different degrees but both express the following= "i want you to stay with me" meaning that they mean a lot to me, enough to stand up for them if the situations calls for it.
in my opinion, and speaking about the light-hearted concept, its not necessary to even mention the word to familly or friends because it is mutual, i think that the feeling comes inside the word friendship just by thinking that a friendly person can stand up for others he doesnt even know, its a love for ties with others that gets stronger when the tie grows.
the passionate one is more complicated and can be easily mistaken... people can just feel they love someone when its just a natural "urge" u could say, generated from the other person being pretty (just an example). in my opinion the real deal is when u like the person not minding looks at all, something that goes beyond shape-race-beliefs and whatsoever. it is not a love for ties but a feeling directed to someone in particular because of the person itself, why is it complicated? cos its not mutual... not all the time at least, u can feel something the other person doesnt even realize unless u say so, and even if thats the case, it is trully hard to make a relationship work if one of the members doesnt feel anything and needs to grow feelings for the other party and this, unfortunatelly is the most common case.


why would i say no to someone who has confessed to me? because i think its trully awful from me to accept something i cant give back. its not a matter of looks at all, as i mentioned u can feel it as well as not no matter how the other looks (again, in some cases only). i do enjoy making people feel happy but what kind of happyness will i cause if i fake my feelings for that person? and how big will the depression be if the truth is revieled? more harm than good. those are my reasons.

finally i just want to make a comment related to this: in what do u think socity has failed to make a feeling so deep get distorted? in the past, people could find a partner way easier, faster, earlier and the relationship just flowed perfectly without barriers and problems, look at ur grandparents if u dont believe me. now compare that with nowadays, at least here in argentina, love works this way: girls who dress up sluttyly get the attention of jerks, boys have to act like jerks and have money recieve love. this twisted shit might sound like they are just teens playing arround but people indeed fall in love in those terms and act the way they found each other even in the relationship, girls keep on being slutty, boys keep on being jerks but my point is, ALL THE GIRLS, ALL THE BOYS, everyone, most commonly teens are like that, just what the hell has caused their thoughts to act the same way and make them be capable of liking someone who just causes harm physically and mentally? speaking about the girls case of course and also, how can every male teenager love a person who barely dresses properly to get more attention and who flirts with others while having something with u? was love always a weak feeling that would get distorted by the media this easily? cos if its a general thing, happening on most of the population, i cant find another meaningful source to this problem.


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PostSubject: Re: What does "I Love You" mean to you?   Wed Nov 06, 2013 12:09 am

As a teenager, that just slightly offended me. Now allow me to answer your questions with my experiences. First, girls dress up at first to boost their confidence. If you look confident, you might be able to feel confident too, and soon you'll believe that you are a confident person. Then, it starts getting to their heads and they take it to extremes. I largely blame the media for this "you have to be pretty to have friends" mentality.

But there is a huge downside to dressing up as a slut. I've seen that, the more popular you are, the more friends you have, and the less each one means to you. Those kinds of people have many friends, but really, how many of those are true friends? It's pointless in my opinion. However, in my school, the number of girls who dress like sluts are actually few and far in between (Rather, most girls dress very fashionably and chic. There's a difference.) and the drama is minimized. Or maybe we're just a weird exception. Now even though there are sluts and there are jerks in my school, I've seen a lot of very happy couples that last a very long time.

The generalization that sluts attract jerks and it becomes one big mess, is really just that. A generalization. Everyone talks about those people... the media, teens, adults... And because it's given so much attention, I think people out there forget that there are a lot of good-hearted people and healthy love out there. It just becomes so overshadowed by the negativity that people assume it doesn't really exist anymore. But if you look really hard, you'll start to see it.



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PostSubject: Re: What does "I Love You" mean to you?   Wed Nov 06, 2013 12:30 am

Vezzel wrote:
...look at ur grandparents if u dont believe me. now compare that with nowadays, at least here in argentina, love works this way...
Ruriel wrote:
As a teenager, that just slightly offended me. Now allow me to answer your questions with my experiences. First, girls dress up at first to boost their confidence. If you look confident, you might be able to feel confident too, and soon you'll believe that you are a confident person. Then, it starts getting to their heads and they take it to extremes. I largely blame the media for this "you have to be pretty to have friends" mentality.

But there is a huge downside to dressing up as a slut. I've seen that, the more popular you are, the more friends you have, and the less each one means to you. Those kinds of people have many friends, but really, how many of those are true friends? It's pointless in my opinion. However, in my school, the number of girls who dress like sluts are actually few and far in between (Rather, most girls dress very fashionably and chic. There's a difference.) and the drama is minimized. Or maybe we're just a weird exception. Now even though there are sluts and there are jerks in my school, I've seen a lot of very happy couples that last a very long time.

The generalization that sluts attract jerks and it becomes one big mess, is really just that. A generalization. Everyone talks about those people... the media, teens, adults... And because it's given so much attention, I think people out there forget that there are a lot of good-hearted people and healthy love out there. It just becomes so overshadowed by the negativity that people assume it doesn't really exist anymore. But if you look really hard, you'll start to see it.
wanted to point that out in case i cause a misunderstanding, not willing to cause trouble 2 days after getting back, sorry for the slight offence if u felt that way >_<

do u mean that, by thinking that it is something common, it becomes common for the mentallity of the population? we were discussing this with simon a while ago, reaching the conclussion that it can affect teens who are not that mentally strong (not generalizing at all in these comments, just talking from this areas case)and others who havent adapted that way of being but rather copied the rest to form part of the group in someway or to fit in the kind of teenagish socity they live in, thoughts about that?


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PostSubject: Re: What does "I Love You" mean to you?   Wed Nov 06, 2013 1:12 am

For me, there's 3 of them as well:

Family: You love and prioritize your family over anything else to maintain good relationship towards them.

Friends: They serve as a sentimental piece of your life which you loved and protect.

Lover: For this one,

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PostSubject: Re: What does "I Love You" mean to you?   Wed Nov 06, 2013 1:31 am

Vezzel wrote:
Vezzel wrote:
...look at ur grandparents if u dont believe me. now compare that with nowadays, at least here in argentina, love works this way...
Ruriel wrote:
As a teenager, that just slightly offended me. Now allow me to answer your questions with my experiences. First, girls dress up at first to boost their confidence. If you look confident, you might be able to feel confident too, and soon you'll believe that you are a confident person. Then, it starts getting to their heads and they take it to extremes. I largely blame the media for this "you have to be pretty to have friends" mentality.

But there is a huge downside to dressing up as a slut. I've seen that, the more popular you are, the more friends you have, and the less each one means to you. Those kinds of people have many friends, but really, how many of those are true friends? It's pointless in my opinion. However, in my school, the number of girls who dress like sluts are actually few and far in between (Rather, most girls dress very fashionably and chic. There's a difference.) and the drama is minimized. Or maybe we're just a weird exception. Now even though there are sluts and there are jerks in my school, I've seen a lot of very happy couples that last a very long time.

The generalization that sluts attract jerks and it becomes one big mess, is really just that. A generalization. Everyone talks about those people... the media, teens, adults... And because it's given so much attention, I think people out there forget that there are a lot of good-hearted people and healthy love out there. It just becomes so overshadowed by the negativity that people assume it doesn't really exist anymore. But if you look really hard, you'll start to see it.
wanted to point that out in case i cause a misunderstanding, not willing to cause trouble 2 days after getting back, sorry for the slight offence if u felt that way >_<

do u mean that, by thinking that it is something common, it becomes common for the mentallity of the population? we were discussing this with simon a while ago, reaching the conclussion that it can affect teens who are not that mentally strong (not generalizing at all in these comments, just talking from this areas case)and others who havent adapted that way of being but rather copied the rest to form part of the group in someway or to fit in the kind of teenagish socity they live in, thoughts about that?
Ah I was joking so don't worry about it ^^ I don't think that it becomes common and influences others (like a disease or something). Rather, it's always been there, but because it's been receiving so much attention over the last decade or so, people think that the majority of people follow this mentality. Or at least that's what I think.

Terrah wrote:

Lover: For this one,

LOL terrah XD



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PostSubject: Re: What does "I Love You" mean to you?   Wed Nov 06, 2013 9:50 am

I wouldn't say "I love you" to neither my friends nor my family, they know themselves without me telling them xD

actually, I think I don't really like saying those words at all, I use to be quite distant and closed-off and it requires a huge amount of trust to say these words. Therefore, I wouldn't say them lightly, and I don't understand people who do.

And I believe you can (like in our "grandparent's time" xD) just find someone you like without following the madness propagated by media and so on, and decide to spend your life together. Hope life won't prove me wrong xD



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PostSubject: Re: What does "I Love You" mean to you?   Thu Nov 14, 2013 12:13 am

wow thanks guys for sharing ur ideas about "i love you".


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