Recently, a friend of mine has distanced him/herself because he/she felt that me and my friends were abusing him/her emotionally. But I truly believe we haven't wronged him/her in any way. (or at least I can vouch for myself) And while I understand he/she may have issues with trust, the reason I am upset with him/her is because he/she failed to tell us his/her feelings. Communication is SO IMPORTANT in a relationship. I cannot stress that enough.
Let me tell you a story. When I was in second grade, I made my first true friend. She meant the world to me and we did everything together. Same elementary school, same middle school, and now the same high school. But when we entered high school, something changed... She would be outright rude to me, dissing my clothes, finding faults within my words... It was completely awful. As you can tell, she became a really horrible person BUT honestly, I think I could have salvaged our friendship. I could have talked to her about it... Maybe something was going on in her life that I didn't know about. But thing was: I didn't talk to her. She was so mean to me that I was too scared to say anything. I didn't want her to keep being mean to me so I started to avoid her whenever I could. Now we're in our last year of high school. We haven't spoken to each other in 3 years. Not a word. And it still upsets me. Yes, she was awful, but what I hate the most is that I could have done SOMETHING. I should have talked to her. Maybe I was being overly sensitive. maybe I was overreacting. And if she still insisted on being a horrendous person, then fine. But that's not what happened.
Ten years of memories with this person. All gone. All tarnished.
I don't EVER want to lose someone like that again. I still resent her to some extent and I still resent myself for not doing anything. I decided on that day to always verbalize my feelings. Losing her was really hard for me and I don't want to go through that again.
So what's the point of this? Besides trying to tell you guys how important communication is if you don't already know about how vital it is, I want you to know that if you EVER feel like I'm being mean or awful to you. If you feel like I'm a bad person PLEASE TALK TO ME. I know that I often take things too personally and I can be very sensitive to harsh words or criticism. So let me know if I'm being negative towards you. To be honest, initially, I may still feel some resentment towards you for saying that, but I am pushing myself not to take things to heart. I am really trying to learn how to take verbally abusive things and let it go. But I absolutely do not want you guys to feel like you have to tiptoe around my feelings.
And a last note... I apologize for any awful grammar/spelling. I literally just wrote this on the spot to get it out. And uh... thank you for reading this huge wall of text XD
"Baby please don't cry. Can you smile for me? These wings are meant to fly."